Friday, June 18, 2010

hey lovelies :) :)

breaky today was a bowl of cereal:



coffee before breakfast.

i've been enjoying some yummy cereal mixtures in the mornings...


oats with dry cereal, almonds, etc on top


multigrain oatsquares, 1/2 nanner, wheatgerm, tad flax granola, etc


oats with "just right cereal", almonds, banana, blubes, flax-granola

yogurt mixtures for my am snack




so...i have some sort of job lined up, camp-related, and it will be just for part of the summer i believe as i need to make much more than that to help with school and stuff, and i might have some leads that are more related to my field of interest. im finished my one course for the summer, and just have another half. i was trying to lighten my load next year because i have more credits than normal since i'm doing a minor on top of my other stuff.
********
but thats not interesting to talk about :) i went dress 'browsing' with my mom (and dad heh) earlier this week, my cousin is getting married to we're looking and ohh my god we went to a nice area of the bay with more expenssssse stuff and if the price comes down more i might be able to get this dress that i love, its by Joseph i think? never heard of that but i'll research. but i hope i can get that its also sort of versatile in that i could wear it more than just at the wedding, which is nice.


ignore the face because i used my bracelet from
mybreakfastshop as a hair thingie yeeeeee :D

i guess summer has officially started, the other highschools have gotten out at this point, maybe not public schools, the one i used to attend which is located near my house is out right now. it was weird because since i arrived home mid april, they were still in school and i live a few minutes away, so when i was walking nearby or running in the park or just going there, sometimes i'd see the gym class working out. most of those kids were young when i left so i don't think i know anyone but it's still a bit strange.




i can't do the tight/short thing well
but i love the idea, so i bought more
hue coloured tights on friday


oh i've been doing more yoga now, and breathing exercises which helps a bit. when i was away at uni i'd do the hatha yoga almost daily because i had to, and then i became more impatient as i came home and didn't do it much, but i really need to make a conscious effort to do these things as they will become beneficial soon. my mom loves doing the shorter yoga and she even said that she'd like a longer version (i have the 24 min ones from yogadownload.com) so i mentioned that you have to pay like a dollar or something for the 30 min, and so on so i might get her some for her birthday in july. i'm not sure if i could stand doing yoga for more than 30 minutes, i just can't be there for that long! but i could work up to that, its just that the 20 or so minute ones (like 20-25) aren't too long, and i'm patient enough for those, but even that seems long at times.

on a note related to the photo below, i just finished re reading the series last night and wow i'm in such a state of like...withdrawal? i wish the story never ended. i'm so awful with getting attached to things (like fictional tales) and then becoming depressed when it's all over.


(i bought more)
i'm having a lot of food issues, regarding like something that's going on with my stomach. i have a fear of being sick and i also have so many digestive issues and stuff that (dont worry) i won't go into detail but i just feel very nauseous a few times a day and have other issues down there and it makes it very difficult both to eat a variety of things, to actually eat anything sometimes, and also just not to be constantly anxious. i don't know if i have food intolerances of if a lot of it is anxiety or something else, i know that i do have pretty high anxiety and a strong like mind-body connection thus it directly affects me physically, like immediately, when i freak out. does anyone have similar issues, and how do you cope?



i've been baking a bit :) muffins and i tried doing those super-charge-me cooking (i think that's it aha) and also these bars to use up jam so we can buy some new stuff. its that low sugar one but its old and i hoped we could get a better kind, but my parents said we have to use this one up. which makes sense.

im going up north tomorrow night with my brother (my parents are leaving earlier) to my cottage for a few days so that's fun. i start work in a bit and i need to finish up some work i was doing up there as well. so i have a job for july and august but its camp-related, i'm older than before so pay-wise it will be more than normal which is good otherwise i'd have trouble with money for things like school. but i feel like this is huge, since i know we have to eat there, with our kids, the other day camp i worked at we were not allowed to eat anything of our own because the kids would be upset so im scared for this, like i'm pretty rigid with things but being staff i need to be flexible so, yea, i am getting worried because i have no idea what there is there, or what i can eat or when i can eat. plus i get sick from things a lot so i don't know what i'll do about that. it sounds stupid probably but something small like this really makes me anxious.


i hope everyone is doing well, and that you all have an amazing summer. i'm really trying to turn things around as all this shit affects me and people around me (like my family) and that's not cool. it's just difficult, like you can say you'll do something but a lot of distractions get in the way and its much easier said than done isn't it? or is it...? ahh anywho i will talk to you all later, i've been visiting blogs like usual and commenting more because you have such great posts! i usually feel better after reading even just one of them and they inspire me to do at least one thing that i'm fearing that day :)

lots and lots and lots of love
XOXOXO

4 comments:

  1. hey girlie! it's so good to hear from you! :) i really hope your stomach problems improve, maybe see a doctor if that's possible and you haven't already? maybe you do have food intolerances or something else going on, but i think most likely it's just anxiety. that can definitely cause it. try not to worry about camp, it will be so much fun! i always find that when i worry about what the food will be like somewhere else- whether it's a restaurant, a friend's house, staying with a relative for an extended period of time, vacation, or camp- it's never as bad as i thought it would be, and by worrying you're pretty much setting yourself up to restrict, either now or when you get there or both- never a good idea! maybe you could try to fill your time with other thoughts? what clothes you're going to bring, stationary maybe, things you could do with the kids if you have some free time... it will all be okay, love you! <3
    lucie

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  2. yea i've seen a doctor and my gp doesn't think its a huge issue, and the gastro wanted me to have a procedure done which didn't seem to make sense. it's just a weekday job, so i'm not staying overnight, it's like a senior position working there and looking after a cabin in the daytime. thanks so much lucie love you xoxox

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  3. Your brekkies always look amazing! I have never tried cereal in oats, but I just might have to because my bowls of oats are getting rather repetitive and yours look so yummy! And you can totally pull off the tight/short outfit! It looks cute.

    So glad you are doing yoga. It was really helpful for my anxiety and just helped me feel a bit more connected to my body. Wish I had more time for it, but I am in summer school too. So jealous you are halfway done! I like a quarter of the way done with mine and it is no fun!

    Have fun at your cottage!!
    xoxo

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  4. really aha i always think they look bad in photos, and yea i usually put dry cereal (just a bit or more) on my oats. thanks so much :) xox

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