just keep swimming

hey lovelies :):)

breakfast today was a bowl of cold cereal (mixture) with skim, almonds, wheat germ, bit of (un-ripe...:( ) banana, cinnamon...coffee of course, and the vitamins :P



i went for a short ish run this morning before breakfast then showered, ate and coffee'd :)

i started my film-internship this past week and it's been really interesting but extremely stressful for some reason. also my parents were away so it's been lonely and i get home late and eat dinner late and its all very rushed. i get tense while i'm there, answering the phones, just realising the weight on my shoulders. but i do believe the experience will be beneficial, so that's what i need to keep telling myself :)

im having a bit of trouble lately, i feel lost. sort of hopeless in many situations, and immediately something not-so-bad translates into something awful for me and i go into panic mode. i always want something else, sort of that "the grass is greener on the other side" mentality, which is true because no matter what i'm never okay, and the thing is...i think i need to change me instead of just my surroundings if that makes any sense. but then certain things bring me back into the light, watching people who are having lots of fun, doing something out of order (which initially makes me terrified), reading blog posts by people who are dealing with some things but looking up...it just lets me know that this doesn't have to be it you know? life shouldn't be this hard. so i know that things are going to get better. even if that seems like the most ridiculous notion at the moment, just knowing that it's going to be okay...eventually...makes it a tiny bit easier to keep going.


yesterday's breakfast of 10-grain hot cereal (Bob's) and add-ins :)

i want the tone of this post to be more positive, and since my life at the moment isn't grand i just want to sort of reflect on good things, specifically what i've gained from the blogging community. funnn :D but for real, i have learned a lot, met amazing people, and i think i've become a bit of a better person perhaps...

*obviously meeting lovely people would be up at number one. and not just people that i communicate through blogs, but on facebook, and maybe even in real life...i'd love to meet most of you someday, and i hate that i always seem to become close to people that i can't see everyday

*oats...i've started to love hot cereal once again. i was always just obsessed with cold cereal but there's tons of protein in oats and other healthy hot cereals, i guess it started with reading Kath Eats Real Food...and then when i started reading more of the titled "recovery" (but about much more than that!!!) blogs i was shocked at how popular it was

*nut butterssssss and just loving fats in general, i started with peanut butter but then moved to adding almond butter...i think that's all i've tried actually aha but i might want to try cashew butter as many of you seem to adore it

*i've become more inspired by foods, the healthy and interesting combinations that can be created and i've learned to savour what nutritional values they contain and that it's important to enjoy food and just take your time with it, eating is an event :)

*photography...i have loved pictures and taking photos for a while, but i really love taking food photos...not like food porn aha but just really lovely photos of yummy creations, and still life in general, it just looks so pretty :D i'm not that talented and i wish my photos were as pretty as yours, but i'm working on it

[weheartit]

alrighty, well i have to go but i hope you're all well and just know that you mean a lot to me, love you all!!!!!