back to this weekend...i had this random urge to make pancakes. and just bake things in general, i was looking through old cookbooks, one from 1930 and it was canadian i believe (not that it matters, i guess i just like adding that in whenever i can tehe) but stressed liver and what not in the diet, high iron, and a lot of the photos, though there weren't many, were in that odd technicolour, and another book had a lot of photos/paintings? of like jellymoulds aha and salads like that. i guess they were popular once upon a time. but we didn't have any ingredients. at all really. but i will do that when i can. for sure, and i'd like to make pancakes. i don't know why its such an issue. i could do them whole wheat and make it all by scratch and see what's in it, create my own thing, have however many i would like...but it makes me feel anxious and its not just the calories and fat. honestly i think it might end up being much less than what i had today for example. but i feel like i won't be full or i will be or it might not be 'right'. stupid stuff really. and when i started restricting/ed stuff a long time ago that part was not usually an issue. actually i lied. i remember on instance with french toast but that was when my parents usually cooked everything. then i started getting into preparing my own things, partially for that whole 'control' thing and also because i wanted to eat healthier things and i liked to cook! so...yes that is a goal for me, and i could do it with family so its more fun, because not too long ago i would make pancakes on weekends or special occasions or just randomly. so i will i promise :P
i did run once at my cottage, and after breakfast i had coffee while alternating between reads (fun & school)
i always spend so long just organizing and going through old and current things in the house/cottage, sort of reminiscing i guess. but it was cleaned last weekend (the spring cleaning) and i had to put my things back in the shelves, partially books and also like old child things, not stuffed animals exactly but beanie babies. i was crazy about collecting those and they were not cheap or anything so i still have those :) but i think we have a mould issue, and it wasn't that much of a problem but a little while ago i started getting this allergic reaction when i went there and would like get all itchy and throat closing and eyes watering and what not, etc. the first time was like a few days before my hschool graduation aha i was a bit worried. so i would just take drugs when i went up there aha and yea that was all pretty much. but i think it was mould, just from moisture and books on the shelves, so it gets cleaned in the spring i think. but i could sense/feel it when i was putting the books back on the shelves. i sort of want to keep those, keep the younger books in the family and pass them on? that would be really cool. though the future kids/grandkids (mine i guess?) will probably be like wtf that stuff is so old. i bet there won't even be print books in a while :/ ahhh sad all electronic or something ;( i love love love to read and just actual books and not on a screen, that's part of reading, sort of like when you read the newspaper as opposed to online, it's part of the whole experience, even though news is news.
so, that's really all :) i must get up to more cool+exciting things so i can share them :P i do hope you're all doing well and enjoying life :) i know i keep complaining about the warmer months in terms of hotter weather :/ but the beginning of summer can also mean a time for change, and i know i have to make quite a few this time, it's not really an option. so i will :P even though thats really terrifying.
love you like banana in oatmeal :)
Everything looks so lovely my dear, I can't get enough of your pictures!
ReplyDeletethank you love :)
ReplyDeleteYour cottage sounds divine, and I used to be crazy about beanie babies too, my friend still has like 100.
ReplyDeleteTrust yourself and your body to make yourself pancakes or french toast, just something you used to love and yes you can make it healthy, and enjoy yourself whilst doing it. I'm going to hold you to the fact that you said you would make it :p
I've been having to sort all my stuff out, and I know it feels never-ending, you can do it though.
Stay strong, you can beat this
aha some of my friends were insane, and would give us a list on her bday of ones she still 'needed' :P ahh okay now i must make some! darnnn :P:P
ReplyDelete