breaky was a bowl of cold cereal, a mixture of optimum blueberry cinnamon and some homemade muesli, with banana, almonds, dried cranberries, cinnamon, coffee before hand
we're supposed to go around the city today with a subway family pass, shh im supposed to be 18 for the day, though i look younger so it won't matter anyway :P im not sure if i want to, i feel sick and scared and weird, but we're going so maybe i can buy some vintage stuff on queen st. :)
i'm not sure what's wrong with me, i feel sick and tired and its so pathetic its like i want to be lie this. im terrified of being ill, but im always feeling horrible and its like i want to be alone. just curled up reading a book all day long. i get little bursts of happiness if i want to go out, bake some things, go running/walking/exercise and stuff but all-round its like i just want to be sad, but i really don't. it seems so much easier not to go out all the time and it sounds scary and unpleasant to me, going out and keeping myself busy and occupied. i don't know why. i know i'm doing most of this to myself but its hard to get out of this mindset, and to branch out and take risks. i don't even want to hang out with people only like my best friend maybe, otherwise its just socializing with people i don't have anything in common, and most people my age do things that, at the moment, i don't want to do. this sounds so lame but i wish i knew some of you in real life because we'd probably be like great friends, supportive, understand each other. ahh i don't know its hard to explain, and im just selfish and caught up in my own fears.
anywho, this little lady makes me happy:
enjoying one of maya's presents...
love her <3
i hope you all have fun plans for the weekend. when im not in school the days of the week don't mean the same thing and i often lose track of which day it is, if its a weekend or not. especially the last few summer when i worked retail (hellll) i had random shifts in evenings, weekend, mornings so honestly no special day meant anything, except for my days off of course :D okayyy so i must go, short and sweet, i never have too much to say but i run out of ideas, hopefully i can take some more photos for the next time i see you all
lots of love