Monday, July 25, 2011

don't sweat the small stuff

hey lovelies :):)

today i had my first pear oats i believe :) yum, the pear didn't seem that ripe to touch, but it was flavourful and juicy and lovely when i tried it...gave the other half to my brother :P

"ginger pear oats"

this is not my photo of course, its on flickr, yet i thought it depicted mine fairly well

mixture of old fashion & scottish oatmeal in water, with cinnamon, ginger, blanched almonds, 1/2 bosc pear & 1/2 ginger slice

i am having so much trouble focusing on things, especially notes/work which is important. and i get so distracted, but i realise its my fault. and then i feel guilty because im not working as hard as i should. when i actually accomplish something it's such a wonderful feeling, difficult to explain, sort of a mood that i feel. and i have not yet felt that in a while. but i guess if i keep doing little things, moving forward slightly, and try to stay somewhat positive, i think i might be okay.

i found this linked on emily's blog a little while ago so i thought it would be useful in describing certain things about me...

A: is for Apple, what’s your favorite variety?… golden delicious, or ida red i think its called? crunchy ones anyway, or applesauce (unsweetened)

B: is for bread... stonemill (brand) either the spelt one, or sasha bread company spelt (expensive though ugh) or just stonemill ‘grains+honey’, so i guess whole grain varieties, with some sort of nut/seed

C: is for Cereal what is your favorite kind currently (just one!)…oh this is not fair! you mean cold, right? i guess a multigrain or wheat 'square' type, especially this organic wheat square from a local store, its a mixture of corn, wheat + oat flour base i think but its not too sweet and i love it; or spoon size shredded wheat, then add banana. i also like muesli (flakes) added in sometimes...

D: is for Doughnuts, you might not currently be eating them but what kind do you fancy? i dont eat them, or havent in so long. but when i did i believe i had apple fritter, nothing like 'filled' or anything, and when i was little i'd always get the one with sprinkles, vanilla icing too :P not the chocolate

E: is for Eggs, how would you like yours prepared?… hard boiled + cold. w coarse ground pepper

F: is for Fat Free, what is your favorite fat free product? hmm natural plain yogurt i think. + skim

G: is for Groceries, where do you purchase your at?… sobeys or ziggies (lawblaws)

H: is for Hot Beverages, what is your favorite hot drink?… coffee (black) for morning! but i love herbal tea esp later on, peppermint :)

I: is for Ice Cream, pick a favorite flavor and add a fun topping…hm. i cant really have ice cream but i have vanilla soy ice cream or frozen yog often; i remember ordering the peanut butter chocolate ice cream cone at this place 'the nutty chocolatiere' in a small town i grew up in and a 'kiddie cone' you'd get like smarties + two chocolate discs on top to make a mickey mouse

J: is for Jams or Jellies, do you eat them, and if so what kind and flavor?…jam. apricot or raspberry or strawberry, esp the organic ones :P idk like i feel its more natural. we dont really have jelly in canada i dont think and the thought sort of grosses me out :P idk like spreadable jello?

K: is for Kashi, name your favorite Kashi product?…the organic cinnamon wheat square things :)

L: is for Lunch, what was yours today?… im not sure when this is posting, but from this point/day, i had...whole grain spelt (mix of sourdough, ww, wwspelt) bread, one with a bit of cashew nut butter and the other a smidgen of organic creamy honey, unsweetened applesauce, baby carrots and a bit of skim cottage cheese...cinnamon (sprinkled on the applesauce and honey) & ginger (on the carrots and cashew butter); cold peppermint tea mug on the side (i had made it earlier and thus it cooled down :P)

M: is for Milk, what kind do you like (flavor, source, etc)?… skim (cows) or non-fat soy milk

N: is for Nuts, what kind are your favorite?… almonds. natural, and peanut for a nut butter

O: is for Onions, do you eat them?…cooked i guess often in a stir fry so its like caramelized?

P: is for Protein, what is your favorite source?…hm well on my own i guess yogurt or cottage cheese as i dont often cook meat, but chicken (skinless + boneless) otherwise, baked in the oven w like a touch of yogurt, breadcrumb + thyme to keep it sort of moist (for my family as i honestly like it dried out)

Q: is for Quiche, what 4 ingredients would you like in yours?… idk i have had it like once? im not sure how they come....

R: is for Restaurant, what’s the name of your favorite and what type of cuisine does it serve?…i dont go out often at all ;( but italian was often my favourite, like thin crust pizzas (marguerita is just tomato sauce + basil) with a nice greens/house salad) fornello or spigas (places near me, i used to go more often with my family)

S: is for Spices, name 4 that are in your kitchen right now that you have used in the past 5 days?… cinnamon, ginger, coarse-ground pepper...i have fennel seed + rosemary but its been a little while...

T: is for Trick or Treating, what 5 candies does your bag contain?…reeses peanut butter cups, hmm i just remember liking those. any type of gum, i remember being really excited when people would give out legit size chocolate bars...ahh um this is like when i was young, at the moment i wouldnt want trick or treat things...i guess skittles + smarties?

U: is for Universal, what is your favorite type of cuisine from around the world?… im not very good with this + dont branch out much...i guess italian for good thin crust pizza, honestly thats all...maybe greek for some things, + mediterranean but my stomach is always really messed up :/

V: is for Vitamins, do you take them, and if so, what kinds?… vit C, multi V + probiotics (udo's)

W: is for Water, do you drink bottled, spring, tap, sparkling, etc?… tap, and a lot :)

X: is for Xtra special, what food holds a special place in your heart?… hmm well cereal because i love it...but gelato (i havent had it for a looong time) reminds me of when i was with friends in milano italy :) and eating it with my family at this amazing place in my city...and just like certain food at my cottage reminds me of childhood there, corn on the cob when its in season...etc.

Y: is for Yogurt, you can only afford 1 cup, what kind do you purchase? frozen yogurt. (i agree emily)

Z: is for Zero guilt, what food can you enjoy over and over without any guilt? mmm bananas maybe...unless i have a million...water :P if its not too much...just breakfast (in general....) most of the time


that's really all there is to know about me...:P baha im joking. that's surfacy things, i thought i'd post today as im likely going somewhere later in the week so i wouldn't do anything here until perhaps next week, then i have exams. it's sort of cooled down. i was awake for a while because of some storm activity earlier this morning, but honeslty i cannot remember the last time it rained. maybe in early june? may? idk??? we needed it. but its so moist now, like not humid but damp? sort of gross.

im tired now, and spent so long doing dishes, and just running around doing stuff today, idk what really, but everything seems to take extremely long, and im exhausted physically, mentally, emotionally. constantly pretty much. its sort of sad but yea i need to work on something maybe, figure out how to deal with things. i'll talk to you sometime soon ish i hope :P xox


  1. It was so nice to learn more about you! You have such depth and interesting things to say, never doubt that girl!

    When you wrote this: "but everything seems to take extremely long, and im exhausted physically, mentally, emotionally. constantly pretty much. its sort of sad but yea i need to work on something maybe, figure out how to deal with things."
    I could SOOOO relate! That is life with an eating disorder. You don't know how to handle things healthily so you manage them with ed, but all that ends up doing is wearing you down farther and farther and farther. You can't just learn how to deal with it love, don't beat yourself for not being able to simply learn to manage it. You need help to do it, someone to talk with that enables you to look at yourself reflectively. Someone who helps you overcome that list of fear foods. No one expects you to do it alone.
    Take a deep breath and be kind to yourself. You deserve nothing less!

  2. thank you so much love, its also anxiety/obsessive/fears that make things take a long time, so not just ed related things but i guess its sort of similar, i mean they're all disorders i guess and compulsions and what not :/ sucky. xoxoxoxox

  3. jen, we are almost the same person ;P I seem to get so easily distracted too (and I don't have a short attention span or anything) But it feels like I put so much energy into trying to focus and do something, then when I do get it done it seems to have taken forever. And most of the time it feels like the day went by really fast, and I am so tired, but still feel like I did nothing (even when I did a lot of errand-type things) Sorry I don't have any advice really. Hang in there :) and you know you can talk to me/ message me if you ever need anything. We are both going to figure things out and stop having days that feel like this ! love you xo

  4. thank youuu so much emily you're amazing, and i commented on you blog regarding how we're freakishly alike :P xox love you

  5. i'm glad you said reese's pieces in your trick or treat bag- yup the best halloween candy ever!

    i love nut/seed bread or grains and honey bread too! the 'grainier' the better!! hehe


  6. yess those breads are yum and thank you so much xox